Irrationality and fighting,
Paranoid, scared of the truth and yet hoping.
People striving for worldly security,
Everyone feels tinges of sadness.
Sensitive, jaded, observant.
The human world a cage.
Thoughts of family pain the heart.
Busily pleasing people but the relief is short-lived.
The sea of suffering churns deep pity.
Flashes of goodness but conscience unfocused.
How to end the suffering?
In a moment, no more blame.
Wishing to become truly good and to spread its fruits.
Looking toward Heaven in search of the Way.
Trying but unsure whether I can make it to the end.
I believe cultivating Dafa can offer eternal happiness.
Sparing no effort to help, yet never reaching fulfillment.
Wearily pushing enlightenment, yet never satisfied with the standard.
Knowing what? Seeking, creating hope for the masses.
The long years of cultivating, no more issues.
Grace and virtue the pillars.
Yet the spirit heartbroken.
Holding the wish to help bear, but not fully clear the purpose to transcend.
Did I believe karma and demons cannot shake my will?
Assimilating the surface, I tried to break away on the inside and transcend.
Cold and quiet, looking upon the hazy human world at Kalpa’s End.
All that I once achieved and wished for released, all binds undone.
Heart unmoved, vision clear, freed of wants and notions.
Perhaps outside is inside. Regardless, size is not where profound meaning lies.
What is precious?
Something genuinely good that lasts forever is precious,
Is Zhen Shan Ren.
But who can make that guarantee?
Stunned, touched, humbled.
Shizun created the Fa and is passing it on.
On this journey, we are creating and fulfilling its meaning.
The heart for cultivation practice.
Unbounded, open to unimaginable wonder.
With the passing of time, things have died down,
The resistance to thinking things through weakened.
Since last year, I feel I lost the ability to navigate this path.
So many things seem to have left me,
And even my character has grown faint.
Just when I thought I had it figured out,
Did that heavy hammer strike.
So many changes,
And the longer the time stretched out, the more the discomfort settled in,
To the point I felt nothing would ever make things okay.
The karma seemed to come from an unending tap,
Amassing more quickly than it was transformed.
But you can’t hold it back forever.
Though I had championed saving sentient beings for so long,
That fire had become but a flicker in the face of the attachments to feeling old, useless, and weak.
Could things really be that way, though.…
Am I really so narrow and full of attachment?
But the system cannot be fooled.
Sometimes things play out just so that hint of attachment can be fully exposed.
Because sooner or later we must face them and eliminate each one,
For none can be brought to Heaven.
Amidst the pain of that hit, somehow also covered by a deep comfort.
Tears streamed down,
I knew Master eliminated a mountain of karma.
Looking at my new surroundings,
It took some time for me to truly think about cultivation again.
The only time I feel whole is when I study the Fa.
Trying to genuinely cultivate with a kind heart,
I don’t need anyone to tell me it’s the right thing to do,
And actually no-one would be able to convince me otherwise.
Quietly studying, cultivating, I become lighter.
Unknowingly, different notions and bad substances fall off and I change.
What issue cannot be considered with a smile?
No human attachment is really so important after all.
Studying the Book, it is clear that Master is supreme.
What do I really know, anyway?
But when I study the Book, I feel He helps me understand.
When I approach things with gentle compassion,
I feel someone pushing me to a better state.
Insignificant, perhaps, but I have hope!
I truly do believe in magic and gods, and the greater unknown.
And while when one is bound by the things she can’t lose,
The unknown seems like a scary thing.
When one can truly walk empty-handed and clear hearted, and still manage to look at things positively,
The unknown becomes one’s biggest comfort and hope.
I truly wish no-one will be sad in the future, that all beings will do well and be happy.
If my path has meant anything, I hope beings can learn to take things lightly and to consider others first, to cherish every life, to praise the Dafa that gave them their greatness, and to look to the greater unknown with a heart of hope and respect.