Dealing with My Child's Problems with Righteous Thoughts

A Dafa Disciple from Taiwan

PureInsight | November 12, 2006

[] My child
started the first grade this year. Ever since the day school started,
he has run into a lot of problems. I have needed to spend lots of
energy helping him catch up with what his teachers teach him in school.
I have to repeatedly tell him how to take care of his own things, how
to copy down the class contact list, which group he needs to be in,
etc. Several weeks passed. Yet he still seemed lost and didn't
understand what his teacher said very well. His teacher, therefore,
told the school that my kid needs special education and to be taught on
a one-to-one basis.

I know that my child is a little slower than other kids of the same age
and he is also more naïve than kids his age. From the Fa principles, I
feel that being naïve is a good thing. But I never imagined the kind of
reaction he would receive after he entered the school system. When the
teacher proposed to the school that my child needed special education
and be taught on a one-to-one basis, I thought that it was ok to
cooperate with the request. However, in order to start the arrangement,
we have to obtain a medical diagnosis from doctors. To cooperate with
the school, I took my child to a hospital to get checked out.

Three weeks later when we went to the hospital to get the results, I
realized that the doctor's diagnosis was based on test data without
talking to my child and me. According to the doctor's report, my child
has developmental problems. I was not sure if I should give the report
to the school, because I know that my child is perfectly normal.
However, if I decide not to cooperate with the school, I wonder how I
should explain myself to them. Nothing in cultivation is accidental. It
would still be an omission even if I try to avoid the issue. I know
that I have to face it.

I thought long and hard. Because of my child, my cultivation state
hadn't been very good. The time that I had used to clarify the truth
was almost all gone. Since I wasn't doing the Three Things, isn't it
true that I was not walking on the path Master had arranged for me? So
I have to find time to clarify the truth again, and do the Three Things
well; I also have to fulfill my responsibility as a mother and put some
effort in helping my child's studies. Only by doing that could I walk
my path righteously. When I re-arranged my schedule, I found that
everything became simpler. I told the teacher that I wanted to cancel
the arrangement of one-on-one teaching because I wanted to spend more
time myself helping with my child's study. I also asked the teacher to
give him more time and space. The teacher agreed with me. My worry
about the school not understanding me before was actually a human
attachment, too. As long as the things are arranged reasonably, others
will understand you.

During the process I have gained another understanding. A practitioner
knew that I was exploring the way in helping my son, a young disciple,
and therefore introduced me to another practitioner who was an expert
in education. When I shared my child's situation with this
practitioner, she immediately pointed out my problem and said, "Each
life comes from a different world and each being has its own special
characteristics, so we should not use our own standards to judge and
set boundaries for another being. Your serious personality has limited
your son. He is just like a flower bud that can't blossom and this also
can cause the present problem. Yet, your son is very innocent and this
is exactly arranged for you to see." It is very true that I often judge
people based on my own standard. Although I sometimes try to do better,
I often revert to my original state. The forgiving nature of my son has
truly made me realize my shortcoming. I am grateful for Master's
arrangement and the fellow practitioner's reminder.

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