PureInsight | July 1, 2021
[PureInsight.org] I had a dream on the Lantern Festival eve of the first lunar month. It was very similar to a dream I had after the lawsuit against Jiang in 2015. That time I passed the test smoothly, but this time I failed badly.
2015 was the second year after I obtained the Fa. When I faced the matter of suing Jiang, I immediately realized that this is a test of whether a cultivator can let go of life and death, and whether he can become a true Dafa disciple. I wrote my complaint from the evening to dawn that day, and I finished by sending forth righteous thoughts all night. The test came the next day. More than 30 fellow practitioners were kidnapped around my area. For a while, it felt like black clouds coming down on the city. Many fellow practitioners began to wait and see, and some of them fled after hearing the news. All photocopying agencies in the town were notified that all letters about suing Jiang were not allowed to be photocopied. However, I mailed my claim to the Supreme People's Court of Beijing without hesitation. After that, I lost the track of my claim feeling like I threw a piece of stone into the sea. After a few days, the local Municipal Public Security Bureau called me, so I found out that the letter had been illegally seized by them. Faced with their unreasonable questioning, I was pushed back by my righteous thoughts, “This is our right.” They never interfered with me afterward. Just that night, I had a dream. My brother who is not a cultivator and I were walking on the way home. We encountered a giant canyon blocking our way; the huge waves below were so dangerous that we could not see the opposite shore. There was only a thin rope hanging on it. My brother and I went down the zipline without much thought and were submerged in the big waves. When I woke up, I was on the floor at home, and I cried bitterly while holding my brother. Later, I realized that it was the Master who instructed me to pass the test.
This time I dreamed that I was on a big city gate, called Pass in ancient times. Many people watched me, and they did not let me go out. In the night, when the other people paying less attention to me, I slipped out of the city wall. Outside of the city was very dark and I was walking in a field road. I turned around and walked back when I found something was wrong. Only then I found out I was in a swamp and every step of going back was very difficult. The legs were covered with silt. However, since I found out something very quickly, I was able to return soon. At this time, an open area appeared, which seemed to be a military training field. At this time, dozens of shiny silver steel cables flew out across the sky, which looked very smooth. The cable is the kind of chain to climb the city wall and it has a triangle hook. Suddenly, more than a dozen soldiers appeared on the ropes. They quickly climbed back and forth on the ropeway neatly. They all looked like experts and they climbed faster and faster. Finally, they went back and forth every three seconds.
At this time, I found that there were only two people on the ropeway chasing after one another, but none of the others followed. Shortly, my brother and I came to the two examiners in military uniforms. My brother sat in front of me and pushed my examination certificate to the examiner. The examiner returned my examination certificate. My examination certificate was pushed back and forth, but the examiner still refused to accept it. I was impatient, and pulled my certificate back in one hand, deciding to give up. The instructor was very angry and stared at me once without saying anything. At this time, my brother took out a thick pile of examination papers and put them on the table, but the examiner still didn't say anything with a very serious face. I thought it would not polish the result even if my other test results were good enough, since one failure leads to rejection.
When I woke up from the dream, I felt very despondent. I knew that my problem was already serious and realized that I did not understand Master’s enlightenment. I felt despondent for the entire day. By looking inward, I found out many attachments, such as attachment of lust, laziness, fear, etc. and I could not hold on to my Xinxing. I had a dream before. I appeared naked in front of my co-workers. There were men and women. I didn't feel ashamed. I dressed neatly in front of everyone. I feel embarrassed to write it out, but I know that I am a cultivator, and I cannot keep such a dirty thought on my mind, and it is lust. (I have already burst into tears when I write here.) In the past few years, I have always been stumbling on the attachment of lust, and I have been stumbling for good and bad. I often could not hold my mind in my dreams, and I have gone through many extremes. I slept separately with my wife who is not a cultivator, she burned my Dafa books in a fit of anger, so I felt I was not qualified as a cultivator. Sometimes, I just slap myself hundreds of times in front of Master's image. Things got better, but after a while, it returned to the status as before.
In the past two years, I have been working outside, and I have met many fellow practitioners from other places in clarifying the truth. They have given me a lot of help in food, clothing, living place, and transportation. I have also studied the Fa and clarified the truth together. When the practitioners were in trouble, I also generously donated. I was working at different places, I laughed and called it Wandering, but it’s true. I met all kinds of people, beat and scold me, insult me. I did not care how badly I suffered. At this point, I really managed to “do not fight back, but do not fight back when scolded”. There was a boss who is three years older than I am. I have worked for him for only ten days and had been kicked and abused. I thanked him every day and taught him Dafa. In the end, I missed my pay for two days. I calmly told him that I did not want the money. On the day before I left, I told him about the Three Withdrawals from CCP again, hoping that he would be safe.
From the scene in the training ground, I realized that in the previous period, I was brave and diligent in my cultivation. In the second half, the process of Fa-rectification was accelerated. Only about two-tenths of the people who could really keep up. This group of people has hope. Master is pushing the process of Fa-rectification again and again waiting for disciples who are unsatisfactory. Moreover, the number of people saved is far from enough. Finally, when I saw the examiner, I realized that this was a big test, and Master had to see if the overall practice was satisfactory or not. If Master ends the Fa-rectification at this time, many Dafa disciples will be wiped out. Veteran fellow practitioners and new students, Master is really anxious for us! On the road to cultivation in the future, let's work harder together!
Please be compassionate to correct me if there is something incompatible in the Fa.
Chinese version: https://www.zhengjian.org/node/266238