PureInsight | May 17, 2004
[PureInsight.org] The predestined relationship between individuals is truly amazing. Take my friend Ms. Zhang Xiaoqing. For example, if I hadn't come to work for my company, and if I hadn't run into her in the hallway at work that day, we wouldn't have become friends. It must have been fate because she caught my attention quite effortlessly that day as she walked towards my direction in the hallway. Since then, we have been good friends as though we had been friends forever.
Xiaoqing's office is located on the same floor as mine. Xiaoqing is quite petite and slender in figure. She does her work in a very efficient manner and is plain spoken yet always tactful. The first time we talked, she put on the air of someone who is my elder. "You look so young. I bet you are younger than I am."
"Are you sure? Maybe I am the elder one." I was pretty sure that she was younger. Then we told each other our birth years.
Her eyes widened in disbelief. "Really? You don't look your age at all. You and my elder sister are of the same age, but you look so much younger than my sister!"
"I have a secret of youth."
"What is it? You must tell me at once."
"Not today. I want to keep you in suspense for now."
Since then, Xiaoqing and I often chat with each other. We have chatted about just almost everything. One day during a chat, she even remembered a childhood infatuation. She had a crush on a boy in the elementary school, but he was the top student in class and never once noticed her. Then she started to laugh about this sweet and slightly melancholy history. But we mostly chatted about our husbands and children.
Xiaoqing admitted that she wasn't very happy with her choice of a husband. Although Xiaoqing is proud of the fact that her husband graduated from a prestigious college in China, Xiaoqing didn't think he was good-looking enough and was also frustrated by how stubborn he is. She often lamented marrying the wrong man. The two of them bickered all the time. Each time I heard about a new fight, I would try my best to help her resolve it with a benevolent approach.
One day I finally asked her, "Have you thought about how many men you have met or why you chose him over other men?"
"You know, I never really thought about this question. Why did I decide to marry him? I guess that I thought he was a kind, moral and an educated man."
"I really believe that you two made a wish in the previous life to become husband and wife in this life. That's why you quickly decided that he was the one. Besides, the merits that you see in him are very valuable in a man. First, he is a man of morality, so you can trust that he won't have an affair. Second, if he were not the studying type, he wouldn't have been able to study abroad, find a good job and buy you a house and cars. Heaven is just and fair. Heaven won't grace you with a perfect life. Otherwise, you would soon use up all the virtue that you've accumulated. What would happen to you then? Besides, we are not perfect ourselves, so we are not in any position to criticize our spouses."
"I guess you are right. I am not as highly educated as he is and I am not stunningly beautiful. What right do I have to criticize him for his imperfections? But why do we bicker with each other all the time?"
It appeared like my advice had started to sink into her mind.
"It takes two people to dance. Why don't you try to repress your temper when you go home tonight? Whatever he says, don't talk back. See it works."
The next day, Xiaoqing told me, "I followed your advice last night. I didn't argue with him, but I felt extremely upset that I didn't get to express my anger. Do you think he will be encouraged and start to bully me if I keep tolerating him?"
"I don't think so. When you are able to tolerate him without feeling upset, you will have validated the idiom: 'After passing the shady willow trees, there will be bright flowers and another village ahead.'"
A few days later, Xiaoqing came to me with red eyes. "I have something to talk to you about at noon." I thought something really serious had happened to her. At noon, she told me miserably, "We had another fight last night. It was obviously his fault. At first I tried to tolerate his temper and tried not to talk back, but his anger didn't subside. He even asked for a divorce. In the past, I have been the one who kept asking for a divorce. Now he is lording over me. What do I do?"
I smiled at her. "I think it's time for me to share my secret of staying young. In the past, I have always told you, 'We will never be able to improve others. We can only improve ourselves.' But the truth is that we can hardly improve ourselves without the guidance of mind cultivation principles. Why don't you try to read Zhuan Falun? I think you will find a power in the book that helps you improve everything."
"What does the book have to do with staying young?"
"Think about it. How can you be truly happy when you bicker with your husband? There is a Chinese saying that goes, 'Happiness can make you look ten years younger, but sadness can turn your hair gray.' A truly happy person is more likely to wear her age well. I think the book Zhuan Falun will give you a whole new perspective of thinking and help you stop brooding. There is a Chinese saying, 'When you take a step back in a conflict, you will find the seas and the skies boundless.' Reading several pages of Zhuan Falun a day will definitely help you relieve your stress and become more optimistic. If you keep reading Zhuan Falun, eventually nothing will bother you any more and you will be constantly happy. How can you not look younger if you live in tranquility?"
"You make a lot of sense. Is Zhuan Falun the Falun Gong book you often read? Is it truly so useful?"
"I will let you be the judge of it." I didn't want to convince her with words. People are only convinced of something after they experience it themselves.
I happen to have a set of the Nine-Lectures of Falun Dafa on audiocassettes. I brought them to Xiaoqing the next day so that she could listen to them during her daily commute.
Since that day, she would listen to Mr. Li Hongzhi's Falun Dafa Nine-Lectures tapes instead of music in the car during her daily commute. Because she experiences traffic jams on the daily basis, she has a lot of time to listen to the tapes.
After finishing listening to Lecture One, Xiaoqing told me, "Mr. Li Hongzhi did not teach his students to get involved in politics or forbid his students to seek medical treatment in the hospital. He teaches people to be better people. He says that, when you follow what he said in his books, he will purify your body in other dimensions, and make you be free from all illnesses. How wonderful it is!"
I told her, "Would I practice Falun Gong if it weren't so wonderful? The Chinese government ordered the burning of Falun Gong books in China to prevent you from knowing the truth about Falun Gong. Now you know the truth. Keep listening." Obviously she did pay attention to Teacher's Fa lectures when she listened to the tapes.
After finishing Lecture two, she had her first xinxing (mind nature) test. She told me, "My eldest son hit his younger brother last night. I was so angry and was about to slap him when I suddenly remembered something that Teacher said. Then I put my hand down and decided that I shouldn't slap him. I was upset afterwards. It was not my son's use of violence, but my fits and my lack of tolerance that made me upset."
I thought to myself, "She's already started her cultivation practice in Falun Dafa." I was pretty sure that Xiaoqing has started to conduct herself according to Zhuan Falun. Now I knew I had met another person with a predestined relationship with Dafa.
After finishing listening to the Lecture Three, she had a smile on her face: "Hey Dao Jing, I had a wonderful dream last night. It felt so real. In the dream there was a hill next to our new house, and it was covered with beautiful green grass. My husband looked so happy as if he was having the biggest holiday in the year. And he was planting trees. There was a small garden in front of the house full of many different kinds of flowers in blossom. I was overwhelmed with joy. I've never had such a wonderful dream where everything felt so real."
"Who knows if it was a dream or reality? It might be a good sign." In my heart I knew this meant she had started a beautiful new life.
Xiaoqing's complexion was improving everyday. She said she felt like smiling at everyone nowadays.
Two weeks later, her husband came home from a business trip, and he behaved like a different person. He became very peaceful and agreeable. He even made Xiaoqing her favorite food – dumplings. Xiaoqing's husband came from Southern China where people favor rice over flour. He isn't partial to those typical northern Chinese dishes made of flour, such as pancakes, dumplings and noodles. But that night he went to the trouble of making dumplings just for her. Watching Xiaoqing finish a whole plate of homemade dumplings pleased him very much and filled his heart with joy and satisfaction.
A few days later, Xiaoqing told me proudly, "It was my birthday yesterday, and he insisted on buying me a birthday cake. He even had them write 'Happy Birthday to Xiaoqing' in colorful royal icing on top. I told him repeatedly that he did not need to celebrate my birthday, but he insisted on spending the money for my birthday." I looked at her wide smile. Although she was nagging him for spending the money on her, her face said plainly that she was overwhelmed with joy.
Xiaoqing was moved and pleasantly surprised by her and her husband's improvement. She told me that she understood what the idiom meant: "After passing the shady willow trees, there will be bright flowers and another village ahead." She has also tasted the wonderfulness of following the idiom: "When you take a step back in a conflict, you will find the seas and the skies boundless."
I told her, "Nothing is a big deal between a married couple. It is just that when you are upset over something, you compromise your energy field, and have a negative impact on the people around you. Then it is natural for you and your husband to fight whenever you see each other. When you get over your emotional turmoil and maintain a peaceful mind, everything around you becomes harmonious."
Xiaoqing nodded in agreement, "You are right. It wasn't difficult at all. It felt as if an obstructed path suddenly cleared up by itself. And I cannot remember why I became angry the first place."
Recently Xiaoqing shared another little secret with me. "You know what he called me?" I shook my head. "He called me 'his little girl.' He likes to tease me and make me laugh." She said in a sweet smile.
I felt truly happy for Xiaoqing. Suddenly a question came to my mind, "Xiaoqing, do you think that Falun Gong is an evil cxxx like Jiang Zemin has claimed?"
"No way! I think Jiang is the evil one! What has he done for the people in China? But, to tell you the truth, if I had not met you, he would have fooled me. Oh, yes! I have to tell my sister about your 'secret of staying young.'"
I reminded her, "But you have to be careful when you make phone calls to China. Make sure you don't mention the words 'Falun Gong' over the phone. It's forbidden to mention 'Falun Gong' in China."
Xiaoqing replied, "Jiang sure has forbidden a lot of things. I bet he bans everything but bribery, corruption and extramarital affairs! It is ridiculous!" Then she started laughing. I often see Xiaoqing laughing happily recently.
Not too long ago, I received an email from Xiaoqing's husband. He thanked me for helping Xiaoqing improve. I think that we should all thank our Teacher Mr. Li Hongzhi, for he has taught people Falun Dafa without seeking anything in return. He has helped countless families on the brink of ruin restore their harmony and happiness. He has saved countless people from death's door and restored their health. He has taught people to forgive and care for each other. He has enabled people to live in happiness and youthfulness. Only those genuine Falun Dafa practitioners understand the preciousness of Falun Dafa.
Translated from: http://www.zhengjian.org/zj/articles/2004/4/23/26825.html