All Beginning is Hard

A Western Dafa Practitioner

PureInsight | February 9, 2004

[] When I first began to study the concepts of Truth, Kindness and Tolerance and the teachings in Zhuan Falun, it seemed as if an inner guidance welled up within me. It appeared that I knew what to do at each instant. But painfully, though, and rather quickly I discovered that unless I studied these wisdoms on a daily basis, consistently, without fail, what I had perceived to be my internal guidance system would promptly fly off course. I grew a bit when I realized that my thoughts are not my own, that a higher power guides those, at least the noble ones.

Inexperience with the different thinking patterns broached in Zhuan Falun and unfamiliarity with heretofore unknown terms soon proved to be merely superficial stumbling blocks. As soon as I grasped the potentiality of innumerable worlds being open, for my benefit, for me to own if I am willing to invest the time, thought processes and mental energy, I became unerringly committed to follow those teachings.

I had arrogantly assumed that the present knowledge I had amassed up to this point in my life would be more than adequate to "breathe through" all these complicated and far-reaching Dafa ideas, but not so. The longer I study Falun Dafa, the more I am aware of my single, insignificant part in the whole. At the same time, though, I am also encouraged and feel empowered by the knowledge that our thoughts carry great energy and a mighty influence over everything happening in the universe, as our Master has told us.

I was rather wordy in the company of other practitioners at the beginning of my Fa study six years ago. As I progressed, I have become less wordy and have developed an appreciation for each one of us having the capacity to create wonder with our reflective silences and noble thoughts. We have to use our energies to separate "wheat from chaff," and not let our intellectual minds accept every subtle conclusion as having come from a divine being.

How to tell the difference between divine inspiration and self-generated opinions? For me, frequently, if the solution presents itself too quickly it is often wrong. If we take our time to weigh all decisions based on Dafa teachings, we cannot make too many mistakes. Granted, our free will enters into that, but if we concentrate on the process and don't focus too much on the outcome, a door will open.

The strange thing about this is that one cannot really convey in words how one was able to open that door! As Master tells us, and here I am paraphrasing, man's existence follows from his thoughts. If we can continue to study the Fa and think focused, proper thoughts, innumerable doors will open for us, and those difficult beginnings will merely be a faint memory.

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