PureInsight | March 31, 2014
[PureInsight.org] Due to having not studied the Fa deeply enough, I was unable to comprehend the Fa’s profound inner meanings and unable to immerse my whole self into the Fa. Whenever I ran into difficult tests, I wouldn’t able to pass them for a very long time. Ringworm like things appeared all over my skin and on the inside of my thighs for almost a year and it was hard to endure the pain and itching. I looked within, sent forth righteous thoughts, and studied the Fa, yet it still did not disappear. I thought about how Master said that in cultivation one must suffer; the more you endure, the more you gain. I also read Milarepa’s cultivation stories, believing that I didn’t have it as bad as him and thus I should be able to endure. Because I had an unclear understanding of what Master said about practitioners having already been pushed to their highest positions before July 20th 1999 and the old forces’ persecution, I would sometimes believe that I should endure while other times I would believe that this was the old force’s persecution, and would send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate it. In this way I let the old forces take advantage of my loopholes. For a long time I couldn’t pass this test. In 2013, Master said during the “2013 Greater New York Fa Conference:” “Currently, whether it is karma elimination or interference from evil factors, that is all the work of the old forces. It’s all the same—they are just called different names. I am against all that the old forces do. I don’t accept any of it. And even less so should Dafa disciples be made to endure such suffering.”
One day, an elderly fellow practitioner that was going through a similar test told me, “After studying [the 2013 New York Fa Lecture] of Master’s, Master clearly told us that we shouldn’t endure anymore and that we should eliminate these evil demons and rotten ghosts. I’m also going through a similar situation. I used a type of ointment and saw improvement; you should try it as well. This doesn’t count as taking medicine.” I used it twice and didn’t see any improvement, so I stopped using it. I recalled that I once saw in the marketplace a type of ointment that treated dermatitis, and that the label included my type of symptoms. Wanting to try it out, I went to look for it in the marketplace. I went to three different marketplaces, but still couldn’t find it. On the morning of the second day, my wife and I went to the suburban marketplaces to have a look. As it turned out, after getting off the city bus to transfer to the suburban bus, the two of us didn’t see each other. We looked for each other the entire morning and never made the trip. At noon we bumped into each other at the bus stop on the way home, and thus went home. I thought about this repeatedly and enlightened that it was Master’s law bodies looking after me and enlightening me. I looked within and saw that I hadn’t used medicine for 17 years, so how could I use medicine now?! I had made a mistake. Right after returning home, that fellow practitioner called me saying, “That ointment didn’t work. I went to the hospital and the doctor prescribed another ointment for me. After using it three times (three days), I’ve been completely cured. It has only been two months for me—for you it’s been almost a year. Don’t endure any longer and quickly go to the hospital. What we’re doing doesn’t count as taking medicine. This is annihilating the rotten ghosts. Let’s go to the hospital together.” I said that I wouldn’t go. On the morning of the second day, I received another phone call asking to go to the hospital together. I said that I wouldn’t go; I believe in Master and the Fa. With Master here, I’m not afraid of anything. I put down the telephone.
I thought that my xinxing was too poor. It had been almost a year and I still hadn’t passed this test! What was the reason? I repeatedly found many attachments, but they weren’t the crux of the issue. What was crucial was that my main consciousness was too weak and that I didn’t believe in Master and the Fa enough. Sometimes I would have doubts, such as how in recent years, quite a few elderly fellow practitioners from the several groups in our district passed away. There are others that have been under long periods of tribulations and are unable to move, rendering them unable to go out to clarify the truth and save sentient beings. Also, the impact has been huge—even their family members have changed and don’t believe in Falun Gong anymore! I felt sad in my heart and couldn’t make sense of it. My loopholes were taken advantage of by the old forces, rendering me unable to pass this test for a long time! I could never find the root! I recently saw an article “Scenes I Saw With My Third Eye About a Recently Deceased Practitioner.” I earnestly restudied Master’s Fa, allowing me to enlighten to the fact that I didn’t concentrate while studying the Fa, and wasn’t able to melt into the Fa and enlighten to it. This is what caused my insufficient belief in Master and the Fa! Now I have deeply understood that in believing in Master and the Fa, I must be able to let go of everything and earnestly leave everything to Master. I looked within and repeatedly asked myself, “In my words and conduct of these 17 years, have I really acted according to Master’s words? Was everything truly based on the Fa? Did I truly not acknowledge the old forces and their arrangements?” If one can truly and earnestly believe in Master and believe in the Fa with no qualms, unconditionally do what Master says, be a true disciple of Master’s, then Master can resolve anything for his disciple! “When disciples have ample righteous thoughts Master has the power to turn back the tide.” (Hong Yin II, Master Disciple Bond). I had correctly found the root. I healed and passed the test. When that fellow practitioner came, I said to him, “I’m good now. I passed the test.” He said, “This is a deep lesson for me. I said your enlightenment quality was low. Facing the same test, we read and enlightened to Master’s Fa together—I went to the hospital, and you believed in Master and the Fa, enlightened based on the Fa, and improved your xinxing.” Master said: “However high your character is, that’s how high your gong is” (Zhuan Falun). In the end, whose enlightenment quality was low?!
Just when I had decided to write this article, I suddenly had a high fever. This was much worse than an ordinary person’s severe cold. I immediately had the thought: “I’m Li Hongzhi’s disciple, I don’t want other arrangements or acknowledge them” from “Fa-Lecture During the 2003 Lantern Festival at the U.S. West Fa Conference.” I’m a Dafa Disciple. The old forces want to obstruct me from writing this article. They don’t want to let me report my heartfelt feelings to Master. They don’t want to let me say these things to fellow practitioners. No way, I won’t acknowledge it. I won’t accept it. No matter what, I will write this article and send it out! I spent the whole night with a high fever, coughing, and was unable to sleep. On the morning of the second day, I was unable to talk and didn’t want to eat. I sent forth righteous thoughts. If I was unable to read the Fa, I listened to Master’s audio tapes—I listened to four lectures in one sitting. At noon my fever subsided and at night I talked and ate normally. I ate as much as I usually did (despite being 82 years old, I eat three meals a day—two plates a meal.) On the morning of the third day I started to write the article! “The Fa can destroy all evil.” (Essentials for Further Advancement II – “Drive Out Interference”).
As long as disciples hold righteous thoughts in their hearts, Master will help dissolve tribulations. Master’s boundless compassion and the incomparable greatness of the Fa are closely watching us during tribulations to see what kind of thoughts we have. As long as we have righteous thoughts and actions and truly believe in Master and the Fa, there is no test that we can’t pass!
Due to not studying the Fa deeply, my level is limited. If there is anything improper, please kindly correct it.
Translated from: http://www.zhengjian.org/node/121747
