PureInsight | January 15, 2014
PureInsight.org]
I. Growing Up Under Master's Protection
My mother obtained the Fa in 1997. I was 2 years old and unknowingly predestined with Dafa. At that time, my mother read the Fa to me daily and taught me to memorize Hong Yin. My mother said that I was very smart. She would read me a poem once or twice, and I could memorize it. Before I was 2 years old, my health was not good. Every other day, I needed to go to the hospital for medicine and shots. My mother said I was pitiful at that time. When the doctor gave me a shot, I cried and shouted, "Please be gentle!" However, since I obtained the Fa, even when I get sick, I recover in less than a day. Although I was young, I knew I was eliminating Karma. Master was cleansing my body. I remember one time I saw my classmate's cheek wrapped in two leaves for a few weeks. I was told that the leaves were medicine for curing mumps. I was curious, so I also stuck one on my cheek for fun. That night, my cheek began to ache and was soon swollen. I did not care about it, but after a few hours, it was so painful that I could not eat. I suddenly realized that it was the mumps. My mother and I immediately sent forth righteous thoughts and studied the Fa. At around 10 pm, my swollen cheeks finally got better. This obstacle was completely sought by me. Under Master's protection, I’ve passed through many obstacles and now live a healthy life. I became a Fa-rectification period practitioner.
In 1999, the persecution started. My mother and other practitioners traveled to Tiananmen Square to clarify the truth. They were illegally sent to labor camps for three months. I was 6 years old at that time. My mother did not reveal her identity, so the police could not find our house for any searches. Before my mother traveled to Beijing to clarify truth, she told me what might happen. Although I was already mentally prepared, I was still very scared when my mother did not return home. My grandmother and father told me that mother was on a business trip, but I knew that she went to clarify the truth. It was a proud thing to do. My father did not know that I also cultivated. Every night, I hid at home to read Zhuan Falun and send forth righteous thought. Only during Fa study would my heart not be shaken. Every night, I longed for my mother's return, and I slept crying. After mother's return, we secretly practiced and studied the Fa. At that time, my xinxing was good and my celestial eye was open. When we studied the Fa, I could see that all the words shined with light. One time, my mother and I argued and did not maintain our xinxing. I told my mother that I saw a demon next to the lamp, and we immediately understood that the demon was interfering with us. Due to the persecution in our area, we could not often study in a group. Sometimes we hid in a basement. During the summer, it was hot and stuffy. At night, we studied the Fa together. I slept on the ground using newspapers as a mattress. My mother told me I slept well there because the field was very good. With Dafa, every day is enriching.
II. Master did not Desert Me When I Was Not Diligent
In 2003, my mother was again illegally detained in a labor camp and transferred to brainwashing classes. She was imprisoned for a year and a half. I was in the third year of elementary school. It was different this time because my mother's boss worked together with the 610 office to persecute her. They knew our home address and came to search our house. I still remember that night. The policemen took away all Dafa books except Zhuan Falun (Volume II) which was hidden under my bed. My mother was taken that day and was imprisoned for a year and a half. During that time, our area was persecuted severely. Many practitioners were arrested. I was the only young Dafa practitioner, and I could not contact other practitioners. I did not have practice music. I only had one copy of Zhuan Falun (Volume II), and I secretly read it every night until one day, my father found the book while cleaning my room and destroyed it. At that time, I cried watching him destroy the book. My heart was hurting, but I was helpless. I was afraid to tell my father that I also practiced Falun Dafa. Afterwards for a year, I became a total ordinary person. I played and ate with classmates. I did not study well, and I swore. Although I knew I should not be this way, there was nothing I could do. At night, I thought of my mother. How was she doing? I asked Master and Dafa to protect her and punish those bad people. During this period, father brought me to the labor camp to see my mother once. I was totally blinded by what I saw at the surface. The policemen were nice to us, which made me not worry about my mother. I knew that once the sentence was over, my mother would be released. Therefore, I became even more wanton in ordinary human society.
When my mother was released from labor camp, I did not recognize her. She was very thin, and her hair was cut short. We spent a long time restoring the mother-daughter relationship. When my mother noticed my state of living, she wanted me to return to cultivating Dafa. At that time, I was sucked into ordinary people life, so I blew her off. Now when I think about it, it was Master borrowing my mother's mouth asking me to return to Dafa. It was my low enlightenment level, and I complained. After I returned to Dafa, my academics improved, and my relationship with classmates also improved. I started clarifying the truth. I spent a long time helping a very good friend quit the CCP. I was very happy for her. I never felt like this before. I felt that it was Master who encouraged me. As I entered middle school, I continued to carefully clarify the truth to my classmates. Sometimes if I felt that my truth clarification was not good enough, I invited the classmate back home to let my mother continue the truth clarification. At night, my mother and I would post truth clarification posters and pass out truth clarification flyers and CDs. I finally returned and continued to walk the path of a young Fa-rectification practitioner.
III. Cultivate Wholeheartedly
Although every day I did what a Dafa disciple should do, I sometimes did not want to study the Fa or practice the exercises. My mother would urge me to study the Fa, but I felt annoyed and thought it was puberty. I would not stay like this forever. This is my cultivation path. It was not right to let my mother lead my cultivation. Therefore, under Master's arrangements, I moved into a dormitory when I entered high school and lived by myself, which helped me grow steadfast in Dafa and become a true practitioner. It also laid the foundation for me to study abroad. In my dormitory, the bedroom was for six people. However, when it was time to register, only two showed up. One student lived close by and decided not to live here. Therefore, the six person bedroom only had two people. In the entire building, only our room had two people. Others were jealous. I deeply felt that Master always arranges the best for Dafa disciples. When I met my roommate for the first time, I felt close to her. I said to her that we were predestined, and in our last life, we knew each other well. Of course, I helped her quit the CCP. Without my mother pushing me, I began to study the Fa on my own. If I did not read Fa on a particular day, I felt uncomfortable. During the day, when I interacted with other students, there were many xinxing tests. I often looked inwards, and when I studied the Fa, I always found the answer. This was the environment Master gave me to help me grow from a young practitioner to a mature practitioner.
In 2012, my mother decided to send me to the United States. She did not want me to live in a country without freedom of belief. She wanted me to do more Dafa work in the United States. With this hope and under Master's protection, I came to Seattle in September. With the help of a Canadian practitioner, I made contact with Seattle practitioners. In the area I live, there are no practitioners. Most practitioners live around Seattle and Seattle's northern area. It was hard for me to find them. For the first two weeks, I met some Chinese students who drove me to Chinatown, and I learned how to get there. I remember the first time when I met a practitioner, I needed help buying Zhuan Falun. I needed to retrieve the book at Mrs. Ma's shop, so I went to Chinatown by myself and spent half a day to find her shop. Next, Mrs. Ma introduced me to Mrs. Liu's mother. I was surprised that Mrs. Liu's mother was also from Xi'an. When I saw her alone clarifying the truth in Chinatown, I was touched. I truly felt that this is a free country. Thereafter, almost every Saturday, I would go to Chinatown and help Mrs. Liu's mother hang banners and clarify the truth. Sometimes, when there were westerners reading the display boards, I would use my broken English to talk to them. If I did not know what words to use, I asked for Master's help and suddenly the words came to me. Truth clarification in Chinatown exposed many attachments including fear, fear of losing face, fear of people not listening, etc. I always felt depressed when I returned home, and then I studied the Fa and looked inwards. One time, I was passing out flyers on a street corner. I gave an elderly person a flyer and said, "Quit the CCP and receive a good life." He pushed me away and said, "You are all traitors of China! Go home and study!" My heart immediately felt sad and tears almost fell. Nobody had ever said that to me before, and I felt hurt. When Mrs. Liu's mother saw me, she comforted me. She said that in the past, someone even knocked her down. I slowly looked inwards. This was to expose my fear of being scolded. I felt sorry for that elderly person. One time, that elder badmouthed me. I smiled to him and continue passing out flyers. My heart was not shaken. I believe I had raised my level.
After a while, I became more familiar with local areas, and I could take the bus to travel to places. I could join more Dafa activities. Also, fellow practitioners helped me a lot. It made me feel that I am not alone and that fellow practitioners are like part of my family. Since the beginning, I have been helping in Dafa activities such as Shen Yun promotion and collecting petition signatures for stopping organ harvesting. I feel that sentient beings are waking up. Many Chinese people are beginning to understand. For example, I was afraid of rejection when clarifying the truth to my classmates. In reality, it was my attachment blocking me from saving people. Master arranges predestined people around me so that I can clarify the truth to them. When I clarified the truth to my classmates, they were all receptive. They did not reject Dafa or badmouth me. Moreover, they loved being around me. My roommate has a hot temper. One day she told me, "When I am around you, I do not get angry." I understood in my heart that if it were not for Master or Dafa, I could not change myself or change others this much.
However, I still have many areas that are not diligent. For example, I need to catch up my exercising. Sometimes, when my attachment is exposed, I do not realize it, and I think it was part of me. At a particular time period, the attachment to lust was a big interference to me. My surrounding classmates were all in relationships. I felt that this was normal. In reality, it was not, but I did not realize it. Then, during that time, a boy started treating me well and caring for me. I did not reject it and felt it was okay for someone of the opposite sex to care for me. Because I lived alone in a foreign country, it was inevitable for me to want someone to care for me, but this was demon interference. It took me two to three weeks to enlighten and awake from this illusion. During this period, I had no energy, and I did not want to study Fa or do homework. Bad thoughts filled my head, and I was foggy-headed every day. I thought to myself, “I cannot continue like this.” I searched for lust-eliminating related sharing articles on Minghui. I studied Zhuan Falun, looked inwards and sent forth righteous thoughts. When I correctly faced this issue, that boy no longer looked for me, and I felt much better. When I am blessed with Dafa, the whole world is bright. After that situation, I have become very careful when facing the attachment to lust. Master stressed the importance of the attachment to lust. I enlightened that because I had not faced this issue before, I did not pay attention. I thought it could not interfere with me. This thought was the loophole that the demon exploited. I am writing this issue down because every practitioner must pass this obstacle. The evil can easily persecute you with this attachment. We need to always keep righteous thoughts. We must not forget the task we are here for in the ordinary human society.
Master said, "Whoever of you can ‘cultivate with the heart you once had’ will definitely achieve Consummation" (Fa Teaching at the 2013 Greater New York Fa Conference). We all need to follow Master home, and we must be strict on ourselves and not forget the heart we once had.
I take this opportunity to share my experience with fellow practitioners and expose many of my attachments. Please kindly point out anything inappropriate.
Heshi.
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