Suffering can’t Move the Decision of Cultivation

A Dafa Disciple in Seattle

PureInsight | January 15, 2014


I started to practice Falun Gong in March 1998 in China and never quit. In March 1998 my son came back home and brought the book Zhuan Falun. I was curious and I read it. I was deeply attracted to it. I was moved by the topics in the book such as what’s the meaning of life; one should do things based on the universal principle “Truthfulness, compassion, forbearance”, etc. I went to Falun Gong practice site to study Fa and do exercise together. The environment at that time was good. In autumn 1998, interference emerged at practice site. Some practitioners were arrested. We went to the province government to appeal. Many practitioners stood along the road in line. Then the policemen came to arrest people and took them to other places to persecute.

On July 20, 1999, Chinese Communist Party started to persecute Falun Gong. They arrested lots of Falun Gong practitioners, brutally persecuted them and even killed them. Chinese government utilized the state machinery to slander Falun Gong in China and in the world. At that time all TVs, newspapers and radio stations in China slandered Falun Gong overwhelmingly. When Falun Gong and its founder were slandered by Chinese government, I felt very sad. If I didn’t step out to clarify the truth, I wouldn’t have the face to continue the practice. So I wrote letters to the government at district level, city level, province level as well as Central Complaints Office. I told them my own experience as a Falun Gong practitioner. I told them Falun Gong is good. However no one replied to my letters. In April 2000 I went to Beijing for the first time to tell the public that Falun Gong is good. We had three practitioners: one was Yaru Qi (she has been put into the labor camp three times and she is still in the labor camp today.); the other was a young practitioner. On the train to Beijing, I found my menstrual period returned. I had menopause in 1994. Ever since then each year I had a little menstrual period. I felt magical. (Master Li HongZhi talked about this case in the book Zhuan Falun.) It strengthened my belief in Falun Gong. After we arrived in Beijing we lived in Mrs. Gao’s home, who was also a Falun Gong practitioner. We studied Falun Gong book and did exercises together for a week. We had a Fa conference on the last day. 30 or 40 practitioners attended. They were from various places in China. At the conference we were told to go home to tell local Falun Gong practitioners to go to Beijing to clarify the truth of Falun Gong if his/her situation permitted. So we came back to our hometown and arranged a local Fa conference immediately at a practitioner’s home. Around 40 or 50 practitioners attended. Over ten days later we had another local Fa conference at another practitioner’s home near the airport. Around 40 practitioners attended. I relayed the message from Beijing Fa conference at both local Fa conferences. As far as I knew, around 30 Falun Gong practitioners went to Beijing after the two local Fa conferences.

On Oct. 15, 2000 I went to Beijing for the second time to clarify the truth. I took the train alone. As soon as I was aboard a policeman came and asked me: “Are you going to Beijing?” I said yes. He said: “You won’t make it. We (policemen) are everywhere.” So I said: “My going to Beijing doesn’t violate any law.” He didn’t know how to answer. He said: “You can’t go there because I say no.” At 10 PM, the train stopped at Changchun station. The policemen kicked whoever they thought were Falun Gong practitioners out of the train. In the cabin where I stayed there were 80 or 90 people who were forced to get off the train. While we were escorted to walk out of the train station, I heard two policemen said they would put us at the Hei Zuizi Labor Camp in Changchun city. I was frightened. So I grabbed the opportunity and ran to the opposite direction. Some other practitioners also started to escape. A policeman caught up with me and kicked me down to the ground. I picked myself up and escaped again. He caught up with me and beat me. Then he dragged me back to the group. I tried to escape five times but was caught. Later I jumped on a moving train. The policeman was unable to run fast enough so he gave up and ran to catch other Falun Gong practitioners. When he was far away, I got off the train and bumped to the ground. I endured the pain and slowly picked myself up and followed the track to run out of the train station. I didn’t stop until I was too tired to run. It was 12AM at that time. I didn’t know where to go. I was afraid the policeman could find me. So I went to a remote hotel which was ten Yen per night. I stayed there for the whole night. But I didn’t fall asleep because of fear. When it was dawn, I took the train to go home. Then I stayed at home to do exercises and study Falun Gong books secretly.

On June 16, 2000, Master Li Hongzhi published the article “Towards Consummation” as well as thirty minutes’ Fa teaching on the web site I burst into tears after I read it. Such a good Falun Gong practice was slandered as “cult”; those kind Falun Gong practitioners were arrested and tortured just because they adhered to their belief, just because they said one sentence: “Falun Dafa is good”, or just because they refused to step on the photo of Master Li Hongzhi or refused to say bad words about Master Li Hongzhi. As a Falun Gong practitioner, I couldn’t just stay home practicing Falun Gong secretly. I needed to tell people that Falun Dafa is good. So I decided to go to Beijing.

In December 2000, a young Falun Gong practitioner, an elderly practitioner, her name is Mrs. Yulan Guo (she was arrested illegally in autumn 2012 and today she is still in the prison), and I went to take the train to Beijing. When we were in the line waiting for the ticketing, suddenly over ten men surrounded me. One man who seemed to be the team leader asked me if I was going to Beijing. I said no. He demanded for my ticket; threatening to take me away. One man pushed me forward and then another man pushed me back. They kept pushing me back and forth and threatened that they would take me to the local police station. At that time I was very frightened but I kept silent. Then one man suggested they should go to the ticket gate to block me. After they left, I ran to the ticket gate and showed my ticket. Amazingly I was allowed to pass and I didn’t see those men around at all. I knew Master helped me. So I ran to the platform and boarded the train.

After arriving in Beijing, we went to Tiananmen Square directly. There were policemen as well as undercover policemen all over the Square. A lot of people were at the Square. The young practitioner got separated. Only Mrs. Guo was still with me. We were very scared as the Square was heavily guarded. But we needed to do what a Falun Gong practitioner should do. We walked to the south of the Square where there were relatively less policemen. We took out the banner “Falun Dafa is good” and shouted to the people: “Falun Dafa is good! Truthfulness, Compassion and Forbearance is good! My Master is innocent! Dafa is innocent! Falun Dafa is righteous!” A couple of minutes later the policemen saw us. One policeman ran to Mrs. Guo, took away the banner and pushed her into the police bus. Another policewoman pulled my hair and beat me to the ground. Then they dragged me to the police bus. There were already over 10 Falun Gong practitioners inside the bus. From time to time they took Falun Gong practitioners inside and beat up the practitioners, especially the male practitioners. I saw one male practitioner was bleeding all over the face, his shoes were gone. There were over ten police buses nearby. Falun Gong practitioners were continuously brought into the bus and got beaten. After the bus was full, they drove away.

When it was 2PM I was taken to a police station near Tiananmen Square and was detained for several hours. Then I was taken to a labor camp. I didn’t know the name of the labor camp. I was handcuffed and locked up in a small room. Then seven or eight policemen came in and asked for my name and home address. They asked me to write the letter of guarantee to promise I would give up my belief and practice of Falun Gong. They said if I do so, they would send me back to my hometown and I could go home after paying some fine. I clarified the truth to them and didn’t tell them my name and address. Then they started to beat me up. I was handcuffed to a chair. Two policemen pulled my hair to hit the heater pipes. Then they handcuffed me to the heater pipes and pushed my head against the wall. I still clarified the truth to them. One policeman said bad words about Master and said I carried out sabotage at Tiananmen Square. I told them it was not against any law that I went to Tiananmen Square; I went there to tell people Falun Dafa is good. The policeman became angry. He took a leather shoe under the bed and used it to slap my face. He was 1.8 meters tall. He slapped my face very hard. My face was cut open badly. The blood was over my face and my jacket. He still kept slapping me with the leather shoe. After the terrible pain, I lost consciousness.

The evil policeman also slandered Master. I said: “Shut up. You will be punished.” He said: “Your Master went to USA, how could he protect you. Now I am beating you, he is not protecting you.” I said: “Master is right here looking after me.” My Xinxing was high at that time. I said: “Master going to USA is to save people there. Wherever Master goes, he saves people. Master came here to save people.” The evil was quiet. Then he said: “Tomorrow I will hang you.” I said: “I can be beheaded and be bleeding but my heart towards Dafa won’t move a little bit.” They beat me even harder. They called me “Stubborn Old Lady”. They said only I was stubborn. Others listened to them. Soon they transferred me to another place which was worse. I ate, slept, and used the toilet in the same room. It smelled terrible. One could easily get infectious disease. I went hunger strike. The evil used the tube to feed by force. My stomach was damaged and bleeding at that time. I was very skinny. I couldn’t walk, even with the help of walls. Several months later I was released to home. I suffered a lot. Here I am just telling a tip of the iceberg. Today the scar still exists on my face. In winter it was so cold, I didn’t have clothes but Master protected me. I didn’t die from coldness. This is miracle.

After I came back from Beijing, the neighborhood committees knocked at my door every day. They were afraid I would go to Beijing again. I was told CCP was going to arrest many practitioners before their Party meeting. On October 18, 2001, in order to escape from CCP’s arrest, I left my home. Because it was in a rush, I didn’t take the coat. That was the night I could never forget. The wind was blowing hard and the snow was falling. It was like a dead end. I started the life of wandering around. Under Master’s protection, I found a small room to live in. The cockroaches were all over the room. I knew it was arranged by the old forces. Their purpose was to destroy the strong will of practitioners. They knew the prison didn’t scare me off, they arranged the hard life for me outside the prison. I dared not contact relatives. My son and I lived there for over one year. We studied the Fa and sent righteous thoughts to disintegrate the evil elements in other dimensions and negate the old forces’ arrangement. We would save the people over there and walk on the path Master arranged for us. We sold our home and bought computer and printer. We printed Nine Commentaries of CCP. My son is good with technology and I clarified the truth face to face. He also printed the truth on Chinese dollars. Every day we did what we should do. I enlightened I should not live at one place for too long and changed place.

After over ten years’ experience, my faith in Master and Dafa is stronger. After I obtained the Fa, I took lightly about everything in human world. Many miracles happened to me. Without Master’s care, I would have died because of the persecution. I came here for Dafa. I wrote this sharing paper with tears. I don’t want to mention those miserable things. There were too many. Fifteen years passed, those scenes showed in front of my eyes like a movie.

I came to Seattle in March. Finally I was away from persecution. When I arrived, it was time for promoting Shen Yun. Fellow practitioners were busy with the promotion and didn’t even have time to eat. I joined them and distributed Shen Yun flyers. Many people called the hotline as soon as they got the flyers. I passed out Shen Yun materials to Chinese students in UW and their parents. They said they would go and watch the show. Some said they had not heard of the show. They thanked me for passing them flyers. I told them that Shen Yun couldn’t be seen in China. Whoever watches the show will be blessed. They all said they would go.

Soon half a year passed. Some fellow practitioners knew my financial situation was hard. They wanted to help me to find some work to do. At the beginning I thought so. Later I felt that’s not right. I did not come here to work. I had a mission. If I wanted to work, why would I come to USA? I could do it in China. I think the most important thing is to save people. In the last half year, except rainy days, I went out to do the three things. When I was in China, I did the three things every day. Now the situation was so much better, I should do the three things even better.

Starting from July, I collected signatures for petition so that people would know the CCP is harvesting Falun Gong practitioners’ organs. Every day I took the bus at 9AM to downtown. Then I collected signatures. I think collecting signatures is very important. It is a way Master saves sentient beings. It is also a test arranged by the old forces to test people. Master said “each must choose between good and evil” in Hong Yin III. Walking the future path well is the key. People choose between good and evil. Because the cosmos is changing dramatically and the old universe is disintegrating.

I didn’t know English. So I spoke Chinese when collecting the signatures. I used Master’s words to wake them up. Many people woke up and signed the petition. Some put hands together. Some bowed to me. Some thumbed up to me. I told them every one was choosing. They happily said yes. Sometimes the interference happened. For example, the person was about to sign, the bus he was waiting came, then he had to leave without signing. Sometimes, the pen was not working. At the beginning I was complaining about those who didn’t sign the petition. After Fa study, I became more patient as by doing so I could save them and so I kept smiling even to those who didn’t sign. I set up a goal for myself that every day I should get at least 10 pieces of petition paper filled out. Otherwise I wouldn’t go home. I went to a place near the ocean where there were many tourists. Master’s Fashen arranged all of this. I told them the truth. I can endure suffering. I treated sentient beings kindly. They also treated me kindly. One day after a lady signed the petition, she gave me some money. I said: “No. No money is needed. You understand the truth and have signed the petition, I am already happy about it.” She smiled.

Several days later, another thing happened. After I sat down, a lady passed by and some money dropped from her purse. I picked up the money, ran to her and returned the money. Others were looking at me. She gave me two bills. I didn’t take it. I said: “Thank you. I am a Falun Gong practitioner. Master required me to do this. You can thank my Master.” I enlightened that the old forces tested me. Nothing was by accident. In China, the tests of fame, self-interests, money are common. If an ordinary person picks up the money, would he take it? Of course he would. But I am a cultivator. I have my standards. I didn’t acknowledge the arrangement by the old forces.

Another test came. Fellow practitioner Ms. Ma praised that I did a good job at collecting signatures. She said some local practitioners didn’t go out to do this. Ms. Ma said she would buy bus ticket for me. Other fellow practitioners also said they would buy tickets for me. I declined and said: “Thank you. I could do it.” So many practitioners supported me. I knew it is Master who encouraged me.

Sentient beings are awakening. For example, someone said: “Come!” while I was there to collect signatures. Someone called me across the street. They are waiting for us to save them. Some people don’t believe, but we need to treat them kindly. It is hard to save people but we still need to do. Walking the last journey well is the key. I shall listen to Master to do three things well, follow Master with Fa rectification, and fulfill the mission and vows!

Thank you Master! Thank you fellow practitioners! Please kindly point out anything that is not in line with the Fa.

In the end I would like to conclude this with the poem in Hong Yin II:


Plum Blossoms


Like pure lotus in the muddy world—

millions and billions of plum blossoms

In the bitter wind, looking more lovely

Day after day, it snows and rains—

tears of Gods and Buddhas

Longing for plum blossoms to return

Don’t get lost in worldly attachments

Be steadfast in righteous thought

Through the ages to the present

Just for this one time



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