Positive Vibrations: My Cultivation Journey

Jason J Duke

PureInsight | September 17, 2006

[PureInsight.org] I came to
Dafa under five years ago from inside a weightlifting gym in Santa
Cruz, California.  I began relating to a man who studied various
qigongs for over twenty years.  He saw I was interested in
cultivating, expanding my wisdom, and opening my Third Eye so he
brought this little blue book into the gym while I worked.  It was
very shiny and I could not take my eyes off it.  I asked to take a
look.  I opened the book, Falun Gong, at random and read: "It is particularly easy to open the Third Eye for children under the age of six " (Falun Gong 3rd ed.). 
At the very least I was intrigued.  Over time this "Qigong Master"
and I shared Falun Gong.  He told me ways of modifying the
practice and revealed that he did not follow xinxing
I witnessed the presence of another being while he healed people. 
Upon discovering that he changed Falun Gong for his own purposes and
disregarded xinxing I
discussed his inappropriate interpretation of Master's practice. 
He reacted in a fearful manner and avoided further contact with me.

following months and years were amazing.  I practiced the
exercises to discover amazing changes and visions.  I began to
achieve a deep rest, tranquility within my spirit.  My Third Eye
opened and various supernormal abilities came out.  Wisdom within
the vast layers of Falun Dafa came forth in every aspect and dimension
of my life.  I began to grasp quickly the understanding of xinxing
and no mind intent.  Attachments were shed from me like
water.  In the beginning the first four exercises were most of
what I practiced.  I was amazed at how my posture and other
aspects of my body changed.  My eyes opened wider with each
practice and became bright, clear and pure.  I was literally
awakening.  As I soon practiced The Falun Standing Stance and
Strengthening Divine Powers daily and for long periods of time, my xinxing solidified.  This xinxing was infused into my daily life consisting of work, family and friends.  I surfed a lot and I upheld my xinxing
even during the most trying conflicts in the water with others. 
Gradually my ability to achieve tranquility deepened.  From the
beginning this foundation became very important and served me

I have found that many people see
and become interested in the Fa.  People see through me that Falun
Dafa is good.  I introduced the practice to a friend.  We
soon studied and practiced together, while also sharing our insights
from the book.  I taught him the five exercises and about many of
the basic concepts of Falun Dafa.  This practice had much that was
entirely new to him and many difficulties and attachments were
present.  I inappropriately spoke from other levels and of various
types of visions.  He became attached to these things and began to
manifest aspects of my personal cultivation.  Over time we did not
think of each other correctly and behaved inappropriately as Dafa
disciples.  We pushed away from each other defensively.  This
became a major test that stayed with me for years.

A while later
in my cultivation I found myself "stuck."  I still did a couple
everyday level things through the beginning of my cultivation that were
impure and prevented my level from improving.  I portrayed a
lustful attitude.  I smoked from time to time.  I became
attached to different states and dimensions that I discovered.  I
asked Master for assistance.  With His help, my true cultivation
of Zhen, Shan, Ren began.

wasn't until I quit smoking and further removed attachments that I was
able to dissolve my karma.  The debtors did not come till they saw
in all seriousness my wish to cultivate whole-heartedly.  Some
issues from my past were unresolved and needed cleaning up before
further advancement.  I went back to college to raise my GPA above
probation level while also removing my F grades.  I considered
many matters I had not since my introduction to Falun Dafa, such as:
family relations, moving out of my parents' house, a future wife,
friendships among people, and finding out who I am.   I began
to pay off monetary debts.  I went into these "human" things
deeply; in this dimension were the many things I had neglected and done
very poorly in my life before Falun Dafa.  The pace was calm and I
did well with the matters of, work, family, moving out, and
marriage.  When no more matters presented themselves I asked with
crystal clarity, "Is this it?"  Within myself I saw the answer: an
abyss, a bottomless black hole in my forehead.

Within this very
complex "everyday people" environment my mind became distracted and my
attention diverted from the Fa.  Very busily I consumed much of my
energy and time.  My world turned from peace and happiness to
chaos and wickedness.  Like peeling the layers of an onion, the
suffering and wickedness came every day, hour and minute.  Not a
second was wasted as it pressed down upon my shoulders.  The tests
came with great urgency one after another and one within another. 
My cultivation felt out of control.  I stumbled and fell on many
occasions - my xinxing bent
like grass in the wind.  Attachments surfaced one after
another.  People called me names, threatened me, and stole money
from me.  I felt used, attacked, and wounded.  I became a
pushover.  I understood that these people were taking my anger,
hate, and self-interest from me so I did not fight back.  At times
the beings appeared very scary and malicious.  I did my best to
thank them.  My visits with the practitioner friend became
scornful and persecutory.  He judged me a failure.  Those
thoughts preyed on my mind; my body became weak and fragile and my
spirit faint.  My peace and tranquility was lost.  Although I
had much of the Fa memorized I practiced and studied more infrequently
than I had before.  My words and thoughts held no strength and my
head hung in disgrace.  My heart was in agony.  My situation
was dire, as if a single thread of silk held me to the Fa itself. 
Master's Fa describes such a situation with earnest simplicity:

you know that in our discipline we don't avoid the ordinary world when
we cultivate, and we don't shy away from or try to escape from
conflicts.  Right in the thick of this complicated ordinary
people's environment, you're clearheaded, you get shortchanged while
you know full well what's happening, and when other folks compromise
your best interest you don't fight tooth and nail like they do, and
you're taken advantage of while all kinds of things try to drag your
character down.  In a grueling environment like this you temper
your will, you improve your character, and here, with all kinds of bad
thoughts from ordinary people preying on you, you manage to come out of
it detached "(Zhaun Falun, 4th ed.).

This trial was an ultimate test of my will.  I must "rise above and beyond " (Zhuan Falun, 3rd
ed.).  I continued forward and, always, within my heart I held the
Fa.  I would not abandon the Fa even as doubt clawed my
being.  The world grew darker and darker.  I felt I was truly
alone with no other cultivators to share my experiences.  Only the
tiniest faith remained in Master and the Fa.  Then after several
months of my attachments being continuously exposed, a single thought
blessed me.  A most powerful righteous thought: "I will never
dismiss the Fa nor will I ever forget Master – even in death I will
have steadfast, unwavering faith in Master and the Fa.  I am a
Falun Dafa Disciple!"

Appearing wearisome at first the time
spent in darkness was only an instant.  All the suffering and
wickedness dissolved as my single righteous thought became
stronger.  From that single thread I lifted my head up and stood
confident.  I carried out increasing amounts of righteous thoughts
that I will have more time for Dafa study, the exercises, and the three
things that we do as Dafa disciples.  Soon my GPA was rectified
and my monetary debts paid, it was the attachments and my old
intentions behind doing these things, not the things themselves, that
darkened my world.  I shed many attachments such as deriving
humanly purposes, such as pride and fame, from school and work. I
wanted to increase my savings, and acquire a higher education.  I
wrongly wanted to find "my place" in the world.  It was not the
job, money, nor education, but the deeper attachments I placed behind
my actions: selfishness.  I did them for reasons that went against
Zhen, Shan, Ren.  I was
serving myself, not Dafa.  My constricting world released its grip
and the weight on my shoulders vanished and I grew lighter. 
Recent words of Master's grasp this phenomenon very well:  "A lot
of conflicts and tensions come about as practitioners cultivate. When
there are many attachments that can't be let go, your [cultivation]
environment won't be good. If the opposite is true, then it will be
excellent " ("Teaching the Fa at the Fa Conference at the U.S.
Capital," Li Hongzhi. July 22, 2006).

I participate in this way
of life amongst "everyday people" not for my status and lifestyle, but
for the salvation of humankind and myself.  My vision sees that,
though it may appear "everyday," my thoughts and actions must find root
in divinity.  I began to study and practice more frequently. 
The power of my righteous thoughts became stronger. It has taken time
to purify my body and develop an impenetrable righteous mind. 
Day-by-day, hour-by-hour, minute-by-minute, not a second is wasted in
my development.

After all of that work my level became limited once again to the point of no progress.  This time I read the Zhuan Falun very carefully and took much time and effort to see it as it truly was.  Any book the size of Zhuan Falun will take only a small portion of time to finish.  This particular reading of  Zhuan Falun,
with meticulous, focused, unwavering attention, consumed weeks of daily
study.  For the entire effort I was rewarded with one glimpse into
higher levels and wisdom from one sentence.  "The ability to
achieve tranquility is gong, and the depth of ding indicates one's
level " (Zhuan Falun, 3rd
ed.).  Through this one glimpse I enlightened to many deeper
manifestations of Dafa.  My state of ding is limited by the
development of my xinxing
I realized my righteous thoughts are limited by the potency of my gong,
how tranquil I am determines how powerful my abilities will develop to

Through sending forth righteous thoughts from the
deepest dimensions of my being the blockade in my cultivation was
destroyed.  I came to see that an unresolved issue from years past
prevented any further improvement on my part.  I soon worked with
the previously mentioned practitioner to help remove the dark karmic
ooze that clouded our vision of each other and prevented us from
cooperating.  I dug these deep attachments out.  I was
attached to being a friend and zealously shared many of my personal
visions and manifestations of the Fa wrongly.  Sending forth a
righteous thought, with the clarity of my most potent gong, I am no
longer restricted concerning this aspect of my cultivation.  As
Master states in the recent D.C. Conference: "Since today I'm going
into greater depth about the format and state of cultivation and
spelling things out, when you cooperate with each other [from now on]
you shouldn't have the attachment of putting up your guard against
others anymore. (Applause)
Whether it be your blaming each other, using human attachments to push
each other away, or all kinds of states--I can tell you, all of those
are new attachments that appeared due to your not understanding the
format of [Dafa] cultivation " ("Teaching the Fa at the Fa Conference
at the U.S. Capital," Li Hongzhi. July 22, 2006).

My cultivation
has brought me to this point in space and time.  Along the way I
have encouraged "everyday people" to strive to become better by
considering Zhen, Shan, Ren
I have stood before hysterical rage and jealous hate with calm
dignity.  I have urged those doing illegal activities to become
proper and at times I offered them to the authorities so that things
might be set right.  Most of all I ask everyone to set aside their
selfishness when doing things.  As a disciple of Falun Dafa I have
learned to differentiate between the time to act and the time to
practice wuwei.  During
my cultivation if a situation involves me it is my responsibility to
act accordingly.  I understand that my cultivation of xinxing is most important and will form the manifestation of my field and consequently the characteristics of my world.

one's path is carved straight through to Consummation, and the evil
throws itself in the way of one's ascension, why would they be allowed
to persecute us?  Only because of us would they be allowed. 
The persecution is not a recognized format of Dafa cultivation.  A
cultivator interferes with him or herself.  Only I can be a
barrier to my future cultivation through compliance with the old
forces.  Every answer I have ever needed in my cultivation lay
within and every answer, under the guidance of Master and Dafa, I will
ever need in cultivation is in the deeper realms of my own being. 
Clarifying the truth and rectifying the Fa will not only save people
and humanity altogether, but also, through a cultivator's own righteous
and selfless thoughts and acts will save his or herself.  As one's
cultivation develops, the three things disciples do, will be fulfilled
without intent.  With the ease of one's incredibly mighty gong -
as if "levitating in broad daylight " (Zhuan Falun, 3rd ed.) - all will be rectified in a cultivator's own paradise - truly a manifestation of "The Divine Powers of the Buddha Fa " (Zhuan Falun, 3rd ed.).     

The depth and power of one's cultivation, ding and gong,
will manifest to be the power of one's righteous thoughts, the poise of
one's truth clarification, and the impact of validating the Fa. 
One's success in personal cultivation will lead to the success of Dafa
as a whole in the human world.  If one has cultivated to several
levels of a Buddha what would one righteous thought do to the course of
the Fa-Rectification?

How I manifest Dafa through my actions and
thoughts will save everyday people.  As a living model of the Fa
the world will see the mighty virtue and grand mercy of the Buddhas,
Daos, and Gods.  They will find salvation not in us, but through
us, welcomed by our compassion and truth.  Master and the infinite
Buddhas, Daos, and Gods may even speak through us when we have no
attachments or "weight" concerning situations with "everyday
people."  Everyday people will find the opportunity to study and
practice Falun Gong by our interactions with them in this world. 
Assist them by offering them a space in one's cultivated field. 
Master assures us:  "... So I would say that the environment Dafa
disciples have can temper people. As a Dafa disciple in this society,
no matter what kind of setting or corner of society you find yourself
in, you are playing a positive role. Regardless of whether you are
clarifying the truth and validating the Fa or doing things not so
directly connected to Dafa, you are nonetheless saving sentient beings
and are playing huge roles (applause),
and that is because your righteous thoughts and compassionate field are
having a positive effect " ("Teaching the Fa at the Fa Conference at
the U.S. Capital," Li Hongzhi. July 22, 2006).

Into uncharted
waters my boat sails, but a new stage that is nobler, righteous, and
dignified blossoms.  The world grows brighter and is simply happy
to see me.

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