Letting Go of Notions and Rejecting Apathy

Xiao Lian

PureInsight | July 9, 2006

[PureInsight.org] By nature, I am a reserved person and don't like to
talk. In addition, since I was young, I have fostered a "notion" which
is extremely tenacious yet very difficult to detect. My notion is that
I don't want to criticize or to change others. Gradually I formed a
character that considers most things irrelevant to myself. When others
have problems and need assistance, I do lend a helping hand. However, I
restrict my help at just physically helping them. I don't  remind
people the rational reasons behind their problems. After I started to
practice Falun Dafa, this area has always remained a big loophole to
me. Ten years have passed. I only realized it a few days ago that
my  behavior is actually a reflection of my apathy and lack of a
sense of responsibility toward others.  

Ever since I started to cultivate Falun Dafa, I have done things based
on the following understanding: no matter what criticism or suggestions
that others made to me either in Dafa projects or issues related to
personal cultivation, I would accept those sincerely and modestly. Even
when I didn't feel comfortable at that moment, I tried my best to look
inward to find my own shortcomings. My purpose is to eliminate it from
the root. Regardless of whether there are impure and unkind elements
behind other people's speeches, I would try my best to be tolerant.

Of course, there are often times when my human sense of self-esteem
surfaces. When that happens, I feel pained. At such times, it is
impossible to talk about tolerance. I would only constantly look for
others' shortcomings. After a few days, I would become aware that what
needs to be eliminated is actually my feeling of discomfort and search
for various excuses. What is the use to discuss who is right and who is
wrong at the surface level?!

I never point out the problems of fellow practitioners to them. I tell
myself, "Perhaps he will realize his own problems later on. If I say
that he has this attachment and that attachment, he will say that I am
argumentative or jealous." In order to avoid "such kind of unnecessary
conflict" and do what I have to do quietly, I rarely make suggestions
to other practitioners except on Dafa-related projects.  In
contrast, many fellow practitioners have been very responsible towards
me and pointed out many shortcomings of mine. Thus they have helped me
to overcome many of my mistakes and speeded up my progress of
maturation. Now when I think about it, I am really grateful for
practitioners' kind reminders.

We cultivate within a group and certainly face various situations
during our interactions. Through these encounters, our karma, notions
and attachments will be removed and in their places we will be able to
cultivate mercy and enlighten ourselves. When we are with our fellow
cultivators, we can't just see others' shortcomings. We should focus on
their good aspects and treat them with mercy and tolerance. This will
show one's cultivation state. However, when you see the shortcomings of
other practitioners, you ought to point them out. You need to have a
pure and kind heart.  Out of the sense of responsibility toward a
fellow practitioner, you can't ignore it when you see that a certain
attachment is interfering and harming him in his own dimension. We have
no right to give orders to other people, nor should we criticize
others. Under such a constraint, isn't how we should continue to
correct our state indeed the process of achieving self elevation?  

Please allow me to give an example on how my indifference caused
problems and interferences to the local Fa-rectification environment of
our region. Practitioner A was forced to leave his home due to the
persecution. He rented an apartment. After his lease ended, he didn't
contact the landlord in time to renew the lease. The landlord broke the
lock, went inside the apartment, found a lot of Dafa books and
material, and took the material home. Because of righteous thoughts and
righteous action of practitioner A and other practitioners, the
landlord eventually returned the material to practitioner A without
incident. But a while later, a group of police came to the apartment
building. They knocked on each door to check for the home registration
card of each resident. Many practitioners lived in the building. Some
thought Practitioner A was a secret agent who had deliberately exposed
himself so that the police would have a reason to search the apartment
building and round up more practitioners.   

When I think about what had happened, I know I could have done things
differently. If I had considered the pressure that Practitioner A was
under and truly treated his business as exactly my own, I would have
called the landlord using a public payphone and taken care of the new
lease. Wouldn't that have taken care of everything? But at that time I
only reminded practitioner A that his lease was about to end and he
needed to talk to the landlord as early as possible. In my mind, I felt
that after I had told him about the lease, I had absolved all my
responsibility and what happened next would have nothing to do with me
anymore. Later on when problems took place, I still didn't realize my
apathy and selfishness. I only tried to explain to local practitioners
that we had gotten all the Dafa material back from the landlord and the
police showing up had nothing to do with practitioner A. Now it appears
that it indeed might have something to do with him. When I saw
practitioner A, I would complain, "If you had listened to me and taken
care of your lease, you wouldn't have ended up with so many problems."
I was unhappy about him because local practitioners developed negative
opinions about both of us, because he and I have a close relationship.
But I didn't really think about myself during that process and try to
see if there are areas that I need to improve! It has been almost one
year since that event. Only recently I realized that I had an
indifferent, selfish attachment which is very bad and dirty.

A cultivator has to look inward under any situation. This should be how
we should ask of ourselves. We eventually need to cultivate to a state
where we have neither selfishness nor the sense of self. When we see
other practitioners' attachments and shortcomings, we need to point
them out with kindness and avoid a situation where they don't
recognize  their attachment for a long period of time. If we don't
do that, it might leave regret for us and the Fa-rectification
situations around us. Is it also what we need to achieve in our
cultivation?! But we should not be attached to whether others will

Let us remove ours notions and awaken from our indifferent states. We
need to be noble and open like real cultivators. We should face
everything with an open mind and do the Three Things purely as
Fa-Rectification Period Dafa Disciples. Let us cultivate ourselves well
and form a firm, united one body with fellow practitioners around us
and do a better job at saving sentient beings! We should not let down
our Master's mercy and great hope for us!

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