PureInsight | August 26, 2007
[PureInsight.org] Ever since I
understood anything, I disliked the human world. I wanted to leave but
I did not know where to go. During my teen years, I wanted to be a nun.
I knew that my purpose in this world was not to be a human being and I
did not want to be a human being. However, I did not know the real
purpose of being here. I felt so alone in this world when no one could
understand me and there was no one with whom to share my thoughts. When
I witnessed other people struggling in misery and being overjoyed by
fighting, I could not understand. After I began to practice Falun
Dafa, I truly understood that my purpose for coming to the human world
is to assimilate to the characteristic of the universe: Truthfulness,
Compassion, and Forbearance, as well as to eliminate my karma, assist
Master in validating Dafa, save sentient beings, return to my true
self, and go back to where I came from.
I feel that I have lived a life of being half human and half god. Even
though majority of my life stories are in the form of dreams,
everything is very vivid to me. In addition, I grew up on the fairy
tales of my grandparents and parents. Therefore, my life has been
greatly enhanced by the mysteries in them. In particular, many of my
dreams after I started to practice are truly reflections of my
lifetimes after lifetimes. Those dreams are also an important factor
that enables me to maintain a firm belief in my cultivation of Dafa.
I would like to share all the dreams in my past that have anything to
do with cultivation and thus also serve as motivating forces for my own
My father told me that when my mother was giving birth to me, he had a
dream. In the dream, there was a stage being built next to the village.
It was a huge stage with long curtains and the continuous beating of
gongs and drums. A large crowd was waiting for the show to start. After
a long while, my father could not wait any longer, ran up on the stage,
and asked, "What is going on?"
Behind the curtain, there were a few beautiful girls laughing and playing and they said, "We are waiting for someone."
My father came back to the audience and waited. Not long afterwards,
people shouted, "Coming! Coming!" My father looked toward the direction
of the shouting and saw a sedan carried by eight people just being set
on the ground. A tall middle-aged man walked out the sedan carriage and
the curtains on the stage were pulled open at the same time: The show
began right then!
Meanwhile my mother shouted, "Hurry, it hurts and the baby is about to
come out!" My father woke up from his dream. My mother looked at
me and said, "She is so skinny and cries with her eyes open. I am
afraid that she won't make it and she is only as big as the size of a
My father told my mother about his dream and said, "Just keep her.
Perhaps, this baby is someone special." We have five sisters in our
2. Walking into the photograph
My third eye was open since I was little. At night, when I looked into
the darkness, I could see many colorful clouds moving back and forth.
Therefore I would not let my mother turn the light off at night.
Once when I was visiting my relatives, I looked carefully at a picture
of the entire family. I had a dream that night that I came back to the
house and the photograph was no longer a piece of paper but a vast
dimension instead. The people in the picture were moving and they could
walk in the photo. Some were making a meal. I thought that it was
very interesting and walked into the photo. I helped them to sweep the
floor and talked to them, but they ignored me as if they did not see
me. I even ate with them, but they ignored me again. I walked back out
of the photo because it was boring for me. After I walked out, everyone
became stationary again. The photo also returned to being a piece
3. A smiling Tathagata
When I was about eight years old, the moonlight came in from the window
one night and I could not sleep, so I peeked out from the quilt at the
ground. Suddenly, a round, red-and-yellow-colored face of a tathagata
smiled at me with his mouth wide open. I did not hear the laughter and
I felt quiet strange and shouted:
"Mother! Do you see there is a round yellow and red face laughing?"
My mother said, "Where? How come I cannot see it?"
"He is at the lower part of the wall. How come you cannot see him?"
"He is a passing by Buddha. Just cover yourself with the quilt."
My mother was very frightened, but I was not. I still looked at his
smiling face. After a little while, my mother asked, "Is he still
there?" I said, "Yes."
My mother went and took the cleaver from the kitchen. She ground the
cleaver against the stone water container for a while and turned the
light off. She said, "Just close your eyes."
I discovered that the round Buddha face was still smiling at me in the dark. Mother asked me again, "Still there?"
"Yes, smiling at me."
Mother was more frightened and she said, "What should we do? Let's go and find your Dad."
For generations, the men in our family have been doctors of Chinese
medicine and so is my father. Mother said, "What are you going to
say to this child? She said there was big Buddha face smiling at her in
the middle of the night."
Father pointed to the row of Buddha statues on the shelf and said, "Take a look. Which one of them is it?"
I saw a laughing Buddha with a big round belly and said, "Yes, this one."
"Oh, that is a Tathagata. He really likes you. Don't be afraid. Come and kowtow to him!"
Then my Father struck the drug urn and made a clang clang noise that
supposed to eliminate evil. Father burned incense and asked me to
kowtow three times. Afterwards, my mother and I went back to sleep. I
did not see that Buddha face again.
4. A Phoenix came down from the sky
I had this dream when I was little. In the dream, there was a huge
phoenix that came down from the sky. The phoenix was as large as our
house. Its dazzling colorful wings were so beautiful that it is
beyond description. I told my grandfather about it. He said,
"Dreaming of a phoenix is a good thing. The Phoenix is a bird
from Heaven. I would like to change your name to Feng (phoenix in
Chinese). When you grow up, your will be called Tang Feng. My father
was also in favor of Tang Feng.