PureInsight | June 15, 2017
[PureInsight.org] Some articles mention, how practitioners have experienced interference and suffered illness Karma tribulations over a long period without realizing the reason. Some practitioners even passed away helplessly, I too suffered a similar experience. Coughing had bothered me for 3 years. Recently, I realized my righteous thoughts regarding my illness karma had an attachment to “worry and fear of death”. For sure, those were not the exact reasons that I was interfered with but felt I needed to talk about my attachment to the karma.
Firstly, the concepts of sickness and death were still hidden in my mind
I started my coughing and gasping for breath two years ago. Later I could hear the cock song from my lung which meant the karma was transferred deeply in to the lung. Sometimes I even had asthma. As an experienced practitioner, I knew we didn’t have any karma. If we did, it was more black matter emerging or it was interference and persecution by the old forces. As long as I insisted on Fa study, looking inward and sending forth righteous thoughts to deny it, it should go. However, the karma was still there and even worse. I was confused as to why normal people could find recovery by just saying “Falun Dafa is good”, but I couldn’t?
Looking inward deeply, I found I was ok to deal with small amounts of karma. However, this big long term karma caused more attachments to surface, including “asthma and the fear of death”. I thought I no longer had these attachments. It meant the concepts of “disease, worry and fear of death” were still in my mind. This emerged because my Mom suffered serious asthma before she passed away. My sister was in the same situation. She also said she was afraid that she had to suffer the same thing as my Mom did. The shadow of their asthma caused the illness to appear.
Secondly, I did not realize that "disease", "worry" & "fear of death" were attachments
For many years I held on to the concept that these illnesses were merely normal conditions, yet my lack of righteous thoughts allowed these conditions to remain longer than they should. I also did not raise my level through such tribulations.
I also enlightened to the fact, that I was not even aware of these attachments. As an experienced disciple I had such poor enlightenment quality. Another understanding I had, was how caught up in the maze I had become, deluded by the ‘Big dye vat’ Master mentions. No wonder Gods would rather save an animal than a human being.
I found I had other attachments connected to this karma. For instance, I enjoyed joking around and felt it was so good to make people happy, laughing & joking. It was only until recently that I realized this was a bad habit, one of showing off my own humor but I failed to cultivate my speech. I have left it so long to change this habit.
Master mentioned (not exact words) that some practitioners told bald-faced lies. I thought those practitioners didn’t realize it was an attachment. An article said the author was bothered by illness karma for six years until muscle wastage occurred. He did Fa study, looking inward, practiced the exercises, sending forth righteous thoughts and truth clarification every day. However, he still didn’t recover. Recently, he found he was afraid of the persecution from the old forces. I realized how difficult he must have found it, to recognize the exact attachment by looking inward. How many six years does a practitioner have?
I wonder how many other practitioners who were bothered by such karma had “fear of death” concepts in their mind. I believed they do.
If a practitioner with many years of practice went to the hospital, it meant he wanted to live with some attachments including “the fear & worry of death”. Even if he didn’t go to hospital, he still couldn’t pass this test by bearing it in mind. Other practitioners who helped with the sending forth righteous thoughts, also were unaware of it because the practitioner himself didn’t know it for several years.
Thirdly, detecting and eliminating those hidden attachments
How is one to find those unaware attachments? For sure, more Fa study would help because Fa has the power to destroy all evil. I thought I did enough Fa study. Why haven’t I found my attachments to the karma and fear of death for twenty years? The reason was I didn’t study Fa using my heart. Master said in What is a Dafa Disciple, “As Dafa disciples, you must give it thought.” I believed as long as I studied Fa by heart, I could find my attachments or be enlightened to the Fa. Then I could find my attachment in time.
I paid attention to my heart activities. If something hit my heart, if I was happy or unhappy, proud, full of resentment or had worry, I could tell it was because of my attachment. Then I would figure out what it was and asked myself if Buddha would be like this. I tried to remain undisturbed in ordinary things including adding in thoughts about disease, disaster, money, etc.
I felt my righteous thoughts were more powerful as I could remain undisturbed. It was more like cleansing the dust on the table. In the meantime, low-level evil’s interference couldn’t disturb me because I didn’t have ordinary people’s response to any attachments (such as fear of asthma, worry about Mother’s critical condition, proud of our kids etc. Buddha wouldn’t have any responses such as these. This was also the reason why low-level evil looked down us.) The evil might now leave us alone because we managed to remove our attachments, their interference was ineffective.
Although we are not a Buddha, we should mind our thoughts and cultivation and remain diligent. Those negative things, including the attachment to karma must be removed.
Translated from: http://www.zhengjian.org/node/157634