PureInsight | March 4, 2019
[PureInsight.org] I obtained the Fa in 2003. Before that, I was not able to work because of several diseases. Master eliminated bad stuff when I was doing the fifth set of exercises after I attended the nine-day lectures. Since then, I could work normally. I was very shocked at Dafa’s extraordinariness at that moment.
In the beginning, I did not know how to cultivate because I had too much karma. I knew that Dafa was good in a perceptual way and tried to save more people. There was a big test for my xinxing. My husband always disturbed me when I clarified the truth through the phone. Later a practitioner told me every test was to help me improve and eliminate my karma. Gradually, I knew how to get help from other fellow practitioners when I had problems. However, I felt ashamed if they pointed out my shortcomings at first. After a while, I gladly accepted it when fellow practitioners pointed out my shortcomings. I knew Master helped remove my attachment to saving face.
After more than ten years’ cultivation, I still had lots of attachments. Some I knew; some I did not. None of them were removed from the root. I found my thought karma was very serious. I often did not realize it was thought karma until lots of things reflected in my mind. Although I memorized “Buddha Nature” from Zhuan Falun Volume II and knew it was because of my thought karma, when I was busy with ordinary people’s work and studied the Fa less, my status was almost like an ordinary person.
Recently, I was disturbed a lot and could not cultivate myself based on the Fa. Tests came one by one. Then I paid more attention to Fa study. One night, I memorized “Buddha Nature”. The next morning, a paragraph in “Guarding Your Speech” from Zhuan Falun reflected in my mind: “And this is why there were teachings about limiting physical, verbal, and mental activity. Physical action was limited in order to avoid doing anything wrong. Silence was practiced in order to limit all verbal activity. And mental activity was restricted so as to keep the mind clear of thoughts.” Later, I read “Guarding Your Speech” several times and a paragraph touched my heart: “And while you may have heard of karma being referred to as ‘good’ as well as ‘bad,’ either way, it’s not something you would want to have as someone who aspires to become ‘empty’ to this world, and have, in a sense ‘nothing’—as the Buddhist and Daoist traditions have put it. Adherents in certain monastic traditions have even tried to refrain from all actions. They have taken this approach since they couldn’t perceive the reasons behind things or know whether something was good or bad to do; there would always lurk the question of what factors were involved. Most adherents wouldn’t have been that advanced or able to perceive such things. So if they took action, they would have to worry that what seemed like a good thing to do might turn out to be bad. Their solution was to practice non-intervention as much as possible, in the hope that by refraining from all unnecessary activities or actions they would avoid making karma” (Zhuan Falun). Now, I have a deeper understanding of “no action”, and I can realize and deny the thought karma in time. Because the cultivated side was separated, the uncultivated side had to study more Fa to strengthen the main consciousness and eliminate interference from thought karma.
Looking inward carefully, I had an attachment to taking advantages of others. I always wanted to get a better deal in grocery shopping. My kid was in university, and I had to pay his monthly living expenses, so I was always concerned about budget. A fellow practitioner told me my cultivation changed my original path and money should be enough, but I still worried about it often. Thinking deeply, it was because I did not trust the Fa and Master enough and could not eliminate the attachment to worry. Actually even if I paid more money, I should not feel bad because I would not lose money. The black matter in my body was transformed into white matter. These ideas controlled me if my main consciousness was not strong enough. I already knew the relationship between loss and gain. Why was it so hard to eliminate it? I realized it was because of my deep-seated notions. It was a cultivation process as well. I should deny it immediately whenever I found it and eliminate it. I felt so anxious about my attachments because Fa-rectification would be ending soon. I must arrange my time well to study the Fa better and improve myself quickly.
I got involved in several truth clarification projects in Taiwan. The environment changed. Many public security officials understood the truth. The verbal abuse was not as crazy as before, but there were still many irrational people unaware of the truth. If these public security officials knew what they would pay to persecute Falun Gong practitioners, they would not dare do so. The persecution would not be so cruel. Actually when they were irrational, their bad thoughts were manipulated by evil spirits.
Once a person said Falun Gong was not good. I told him, “According to the 14 cults announced by the Ministry of Public Security, Falun Gong was not one of them.” I also told him the evil party history about the violent dictatorship and killing since it stole the Chinese regime in 1949; how it persecuted the cultural elites and good people in all kinds of movements; how the so-called leaders betrayed our five thousand years of traditional Chinese culture and committed crimes. He did not say anything and just listened quietly. I knew the evil spirit behind him was not controlling him, and he woke up. I understood the passage from “Unobservant” in Hong Yin II, “My journey, nonstop, whisks through dust and wind. All manner of evil are purged, all manner of life born” meant that once the evil behind was destroyed, the true nature would awaken. Then I talked about Dafa’s goodness and clarified other truths according to the situation.
When his knowing side became sober, I continued to talk about Dafa’s goodness and the Tiananmen self-immolation pseudo-case. I also gave over-the-wall software and the contact information of the World Organization to Investigate the Persecution of Falun Gong. Finally, I said, “You don’t know how many families were broken; how many people were sentenced to reeducation through labor; how many people were tortured to death; Falun Gong practitioners had their organs harvesting live just because the sinner Jiang Zemin launched the persecution against Falun Gong. Some high-ranking officials who persecuted Falun Gong had been sentenced to life imprisonment. All people are waiting for Jiang Zemin to be sent to the trial court at last. If you understand the truth today, please help Falun Gong practitioners later if possible, so you will have a bright future.” He promised. I was gratified that he could understand the truth.
When I met someone who mentioned he could withdraw as long as I gave him money, I said, “I can understand you because there are so many corrupt officials in China who grab our money. The Communist Party does not farm, do business or conduct scientific research projects, but they can kill people. All movements from the Communist Party killed 80 million Chinese people. Now they even do live organ harvesting from their own compatriots. We always say good and evil will always be rewarded. The Communist Party will be liquidated by God and only good people will be left. In the future, the talented people will come to lead us in China. All Chinese will be blessed.” Lots of people were willing to withdraw after listening to me.
Every call was a fight between good and evil. Every bell was to overpower the evil. We were grabbing people from the old forces. Now that the Fa-rectification has reached the end. Master extended time because our cultivation has not yet reached the standard, and very few sentient beings are saved.
I realized that I still did not make the best use of time on Fa study and truth clarification. Sometimes I did not do anything, and time passed. What I need to do now is arrange time better. Even in ten minutes, I could clarify the truth through the phone or study Fa. I hope I can be more diligent at the end of Fa-rectification and live up to Master's compassion.
Translated from http://www.zhengjian.org/node/248956